The Phenomenal Mama: #BetterMePH + How I Deal With Teenage Eye-Rolling

As a mom of 16 years, you'd think that I'm an expert at it already. But I'm not. I still struggle through parenting my kids. I feel like as my kids grow older, the challenges also differ, so I have to adjust to them. It's like being given a whole new set of rules for a brand new game. Parenting teens puts me in the extreme end of emotions. One moment, it's all rosy, and quite quickly, things can turn ugly, too.

When I am "frenemies" with my teen, one of the things that helps me calm down and allows me to take a step back to view the situation objectively is when I talk to my mom-friends. When we get together, it is inevitable that we compare "war stories." We usually laugh at how similar our stories are, and we agree on one thing: teenagers are geniuses at doing things that will irritate us! It always makes me feel better after talking to my fellow moms, and knowing that I am not the only one going through that. Talking to other moms always helps me feel better.

taken during my most recent #BetterMePH session

We all agree that the key to successful parenting is to know which battles are worth tackling. Sometimes you just have to ignore the attitude, and accept that teens are people who need to vent out their frustrations, too. As long as they don't show disrespect, parents should let some things slide. Agree to disagree. By avoiding minor disagreements, we create a peaceful environment and the space for our teen to approach us on more significant issues.

Similar to lunching with my mom-friends, attending a #BetterMe session with Coach Pia Acevedo always makes me feel better also. What I enjoy the most about attending #BetterMe sessions is that I get to be with like-minded moms who go through similar life experiences. The discussions are always so relatable, and I learn a lot from the sharing.

Here are some takeaways from the recent session about the guiding principles of why it is important to develop a strong core:

1. Make better life decisions. Assumes one knows what they want in life

You have to know yourself to make better life decisions. Coach Pia reminded all of us that the only way to get to know ourselves is to peel off all our layers until we get to our core. Knowing ourselves is one way of being a step closer to being a better person, a better wife and a better mom.

Coach Pia of One Core and Kris de Guzman of #BetterMePH

2.People make the best decision that they can make in a given time in their life.

Knowing that, we shouldn't second guess ourselves for decisions made in the past. When your core is strong then you have a barometer for moral sensitivity to help you make better choices.

3. Everyone has inherent wisdom, no matter of background or age.

Even the way our children view the world, they have wisdom in them and we can learn from them. Our kids are our greatest teachers in life. Don't you agree? We learn so much from these tiny people.

Taking this into account, we should also allow our kids to decide for themselves and respect any decisions they make.

4. Every individual grows through their own individual process

Our kids go through distinct life experiences that allows them to grow as individuals. We shouldn't cramp their style by stepping in to do things for them, no matter how great the temptation is.

If our kids' encounter a difficult homework/project, we should resist to help with the actual task, and instead creat an environment that will help them go through the process.

Our children will go through a lot of things that are not fair, as parents we can help by creating an environment that will make them go through the process...kids need an outlet for their anger just like we do. Don't react or be emotional to our kids frustration. We have to adult!

5. Important to achieve balance in family, social, work/scads, sense of purpose are all equally important

Being a "Betterme" is about meaningful choices in giving yourself as opposed to prioritizing yourself.

Genuine humility creates personal success. True success is when external rewards is not a driving factor, the very process of doing your best is what drives a truly succesful person.

BetterMe is a movement to moms become better versions of ourselves so we can become better parents for a greater next generation.

Discover Your Core Weekend

Discover your STRENGTHS and how it can work for you by attending the Discover Your Core Weekend. It tackles how to look in your core to make your own decisions and not be swayed by the opinion of others. Happening on May 21-22, 2016 at the Eugenio Lopez Center, Antipolo City.

Call at 436 4143 or 0915 3300 466 or email at contact@theonecore.com

Torch Summer Leadership for Teens

TORCH: The OneCORE Leadership Development Program is a specially designed workshop to empower young individuals (For ages 9-12 and 13-16) with leadership skills that they can apply to real life situations and tools for greater self-awareness that inspire a lifelong commitment to learning.

Specifically, TORCH aims to aid participants in their character formation and in maximizing their leadership potential through the 3C’s - Communication, Confidence and Competence - covering topics such as:

TORCH Summer Leadership Program Batch 15 is happening on May 9-13. 1:00-4:30 PM at the Aerie, Cervini Hall, Ateneo de Manila University